Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
