My dream in life is to scissor with Ellen. I don't care if I've got a dick. I'll make it work.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize
