Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
I am puke
The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Randomize
