he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
Randomize
