Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
Randomize
