Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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