Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
Randomize
