Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
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