i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Randomize
