Last night I broke through a door, was hospitialized, arrested, and threw my shoe at a bouncer. This summer is gonna be fuckin sick.
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
Randomize
