dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Randomize
