i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize
