my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
Are we still banned from the library?
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Randomize
