hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
I woke up wearing no shirt sleeping next to a half-eaten grilled cheese.
Well did you call the grilled cheese yet? Or r u waiting the usual 3 days?
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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