We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
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