awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
