Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
Randomize
