All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
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