I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Randomize
