i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
Randomize
