and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Randomize
