dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
Randomize
