I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
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