Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
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