Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
Randomize
