We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
Randomize
