So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Randomize