That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
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