I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Randomize
