You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
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