worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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