im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
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