Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
Randomize
