worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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