In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
True strength comes from lack of pants
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
Randomize
