Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
