nut hugger
420 ftw
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
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