You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Randomize
