found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
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