I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Randomize
