Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
Randomize
