It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
Randomize
