you texted me last night and told me you couldn't find the toilet.
That explains the puddle of pee in my closet.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
