Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize
