But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
Randomize
