Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
sarcasm needs its own font
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize