Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
she peed on how many people?
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
