I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
Randomize
