rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
I deserve this hangover.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize