is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
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