Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize
