Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
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