you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Randomize
